dear Logan (14 months)

My sweet little boy!

A year has come and gone... A year of milestones and worries, smiles and tears.... A year of you and me. You are so far from the wide-eyed baby boy I brought home on that warm February day. Everything about you grows and changes every time I blink my eyes.

You talk all the time, but I still have no idea what you're saying. Most things still sound like 'da-da', but you are slowly introducing more sounds into your vocabulary. You have a certain little squeal when you're eating something you really love, grunts to let us know what you want as you point and lead the way, and certain forms of 'da-da' for both your daddy and me. Every little sound is sweet music to my ears.

You are much braver on your own these days, and getting closer and closer to taking those first steps. You're always on your feet, cruising around toys and furniture, or climbing on anything that is lying around. You fly up the stairs and can walk so fast holding onto our hands, but just aren't quite ready yet to let go. Neither am I.

You're still a greater eater as long as we load your plate with fruit, but we're having to sneak vegetables into your growing belly more and more. If you're in the right mood you'll eat anything, and you still put down more food than any of your (much bigger) buddies at daycare.

You really love going to daycare everyday, and get so excited when you first see your friends in the morning. I still get the best greetings when I come to get you in the afternoons (you've started clapping for my arrival!), but you no longer torture my heart in the morning with cries and tears.

Daddy and I are constantly seeing you do new things that we can only imagine you've learned from your friends at school. You have started doing a big exaggerated clap as opposed to the little claps we've taught you, and do the cutest little wiggle dance on command. You love to be tickled, and your giggles are contagious. We're teaching you as much as we can at home, and right now you love to show us that you can point to everyone's nose when we ask. You also love to point at our other facial features so we can tell you what they are, too.

You're still a great sleeper, and most nights beg us to go upstairs when it gets close to bedtime. You give great big bedtime kisses and drift off to sleep without a sound.

I know I'm forgetting a million other things I want to remember. There are so many amazing things you do that melt my heart, and I wish I could freeze just a moment of time to cherish forever. I hope you always know how much your daddy and I loved every minute with you, and wouldn't trade you for the world. You are our world.

love always & forever,
Mama

working mama: 8-5

A few weeks ago, in an effort to bring a little more happiness to our lives, I started a new job. A normal Monday through Friday, 8-5 kind of job. Gone are long hours at the hospital, working every holiday, and a chaotic life of little sleep and no routine.

Being home with my boys every night for dinner and bedtime has been great. Weekends as a family with normal sleeping hours has been even better. Having a smiling little boy speed crawl to me in the afternoons when I pick him up from daycare is an added bonus.

The one thing I wasn't ready for? Serious mommy guilt. Before this job change Logan was in daycare 3 days a week. I missed him like crazy, but I never felt very guilty because I knew how good it was for him to get the socialization and interaction that only daycare can provide. I don't know why 2 more days has made such a difference, but it is killing me. I know we're doing the best we can, and what we have to do, but I hate feeling like my child is with strangers more than he's with us. I hate not knowing what's going on in that little head of his. And as much as I love his reaction when he first lays eyes on me in the afternoon, it breaks my heart to see the tears roll down his face when I tell him bye every morning.

I try to remind myself that daycare is good for his development. I remind myself of the millions of other parents and kids going through the same thing. And Nick reminds me that Logan will never love me any less because he spends his days in school. But all of the reminders in the world can't take away the pit at the bottom of my stomach Monday through Friday.

For now I will work as hard as I can to race to that sweet little face as fast as I can every day. And I will cherish the time we do have together, and family meals at the dinner table, and tucking my sweet little boy into bed each night. Things I have missed or taken for granted for far too long.

happy birthday little man!

Since it's almost March, and Logan is almost 13 months old, I thought it might be a good time to share some pictures from his birthday party (better late than never, right?). The lighting was pretty terrible and I didn't take nearly as many pictures as I hoped, but I really loved the way everything came together. I focused on the food (learned from my wedding planning days), and didn't plan a lot of elaborate decorations. The best parties are all about good friends & family, and celebrations of love. Which is exactly what we did.

custom invitations from Vintage Sweet Designs on Etsy

One thing I didn't plan on? Waking up to a blanket of snow on Groundhog Day. Luckily it melted quickly, and only stopped a few people from joining the party.

Of course our theme was airplanes, and I had a lot of help with the decorations. Mom arrived late Friday night with the banner made, and stayed up until 1am securing each of my thousands of photos for the other banners. Together with my Dad they brought everything to life the next morning, filling the clubhouse room with streamers and balloons and as many pictures of Logan as I could find. I used a few airplane props from his bedroom for the final touches.

The room was overflowing with pictures of Logan... exactly what I wanted. I used Printicular to print all of our instagram photos at Walgreen's, and printed some (about 100?) of my favorite photos of Logan's first year. Inspired by this photo from Pinterest, I hung the pictures with clothespins. Simple and colorful. 

Always the control freak, I insisted on making each and every platter of food on my own. I spent all day Friday in the kitchen, and most of Saturday morning, too. Thank you, Pinterest, for lists that never stop growing and endless ideas that I have to try.

smoky cheese ball recipe here

A few years ago I hosted a baby shower for a dear friend of mine, and decided to make my own buttercream frosting for the cupcakes even though I only owned a hand mixer. Never again. This time I opted for boxed cake mix, and premade frosting from Publix. Best decision I ever made. And at least they were pretty?

I also went simply and easy for Logan's smash cake (which he hated, by the way). Funfetti boxed cake mix, and funfetti frosting. And the cutest airplane candle holder from Amazon (here).

 I totally planned for and expected cute smash cake pictures. Boy, was I wrong. He enjoyed the singing and being the center of attention, and flying his airplane around, but that's about it. He wanted nothing to do with his cake. And when we forced him to try a little frosting so he could see what he was missing, it was all over. He screamed and cried, and threw up the nacho cup he had enjoyed not long before. Definitely not the pictures I hoped for!

The little ones had a great time at the party. So many little cuties! 

Overall, the party was a success and exactly what I hoped for. Happy birthday to my sweet little boy! Here's to many more years of celebrations with friends and family. 

dear Logan (1 year)

My sweet little man,

What an amazing, life-changing, and absolutely incredible year this has been. I barely remember what life was like before you joined our family, and I don't miss a thing about it. You have brought us laughter and tears, sleepless nights and endless days, and enough smiles and memories to last a lifetime. You have tried us in ways we never expected and taught us lessons in parenting, marriage, and what life is really about. Not a day goes by that I don't cherish every smile that lights up your face.

At 12 months you care much more about texture than taste, and always prefer larger bites you can pick up and feed yourself. You are finally growing and wearing 9-12 month clothing! You skipped 6-9 month clothing all together. You are constantly moving and crawling faster than we can keep up, and just started pulling yourself to a standing position. You are now 19 lbs and 28 inches long. You have climbed to the 5th percentile for weight... which is quite an accomplishment for my little man!

Your favorite song is still "if you're happy and you know it", and you often prompt us to start singing by clapping your hands. You also clap when we sing other songs or play games together, and during bathtime when the water turns off. I have been surprised lately by sweet kisses when I least expect them, and you have definitely become quite the charmer.

This week at daycare you joined the toddler class and had a blast! You ate hot meals with the big kids, and even laid down on a mat all by yourself during naptime. It is amazing how fast you are growing up. I installed your new car seat tonight and can't wait to get your reaction to seeing a little more on car trips (don't worry, still rear-facing for another year!). You are starting to sit still and really listen to stories at bedtime, no matter how long of a book we choose. We always find time throughout the day to cuddle, and I think you enjoy it almost as much as I do.

The more I think about the little man you're becoming, the more I find myself at a loss for words. Everything is moving so incredibly fast. I have a hard time mourning the loss of my precious little baby, because every day is such a fun adventure with you. My heart is beaming with pride at every new milestone. You are full of surprises and joy. For the past 12+ months you have been my world, and the memories alone give me such peace and happiness. I look forward to the next year, the next milestone, and the next adventure by your side. This is our journey together.

love always & forever,
Mama

dear Logan (11 months)

my sweet baby boy,

Your first year is coming to a close, and it is such a bittersweet thought. It is sad to think how fast our first year together has gone, but every day is such an adventure with you now. You are so FUN. You are growing and learning so much, and everything we do involves a lot of laughing and smiling. You are still a happy boy, and Mama's little angel.

You have grown out of your 3-6 month clothes (finally!), and somehow you seem to have skipped right to 9 month sizes. You're still long and skinny, but I don't think that's going to change anytime soon. You are small and mighty.

The little wheels in your head spin so fast now I can barely keep up. It seems everyday you learn something new, and it always amazes me. You love to wave goodbye every chance you get, and have recently learned to clap. You clap when you're excited, when you're proud of yourself, and of course as soon as I begin to sing If you're happy and you know it. You are crawling on all fours now, and starting to pull up on a a few things around the house. There's no stopping you these days!

You still love to be out of the house, no matter where we go. You love to ride in the shopping cart and explore new places and people. You love to be outside, and you still love to swing. If someone's giving you attention you're always happy.

We celebrated your first Christmas and first visit from Santa Claus. You weren't a fan of having your picture taken with a strange man, but you loved opening presents. With a little help you ripped gifts open, and then spent most of your time playing with the paper, ribbons, and bows. You even played with them for hours at your great-grandparents' house in High Point, and stayed happy and content until midnight!

You still love puzzles and balls, but you spend a lot of your time with your Poppity Pop Musical Dino. You love to see just what all you can fit inside! I often find your pacis, socks, and puzzle pieces stuck in the hole. And yesterday you managed to gather 2 pairs of my shoes and put them in there as well. You also love to stack your toys on shelves and steps. We find new decorations on the windowsills every day.

You may love new people, places, toys, and puzzles, but there's nothing you love more than food. If anyone else in the room is eating, you're not happy until something is shared with you. You manage to chew anything we give you with those 5 little teeth of yours. We still feed you pureed food and yogurt for some meals, but you really prefer to have things you can pick up and feed yourself. You devoured squash, broccoli, chicken, and bread for dinner tonight, and only paused to let us know how pleased you were with everything! Your appetite is unstoppable. If I didn't cut you off every once in a while, you would eat yourself sick. You're just like your daddy!

I can't believe how quickly this year has come and gone for us. It seems as if you've always been a part of our lives, and I cherish every minute of the last year we've spent together. You are such a precious, loving little boy. I can't wait to see what the next year has in store for us!

love always & forever,
Mama

merry christmas!

Tomorrow is a big day around here... our 1st Christmas as a family of three! We're on our way home to NC for the holidays this weekend, so before we go we're having our own Christmas morning. Today is for wrapping presents, packing bags, and lots of baking!

 

Christmas card courtesy of Tiny Prints

 

dear Logan (10 months)

My sweet little angel,

 

Another month is behind us. Another month of smiles and laughter, kisses and giggles. You have become such a sweet little boy, always offering big, sloppy kisses when you see me, and wrapping your little arms tight around my neck at bedtime. You've battled one illness after another this month, which means lots of extra snuggles and naps together. My heart breaks for you and your stuffy little nose, but I don't mind the extra attention.

 

You're still in daycare two days each week. I wish I had the chance to see what your day is like when you're there, but your teachers think you're perfect. Always smiling, never crying, and sharing your happy energy with the world.

 

For so long you've been such a great eater, never turning down anything offered to you. But here lately you are learning your preferences, and turning your nose up to most veggies that make their way to your plate. You love to feed yourself, and daddy and I have learned to keep you entertained at restaurants with a plate full of lemons.

 

You have graduated from your baby bathtub, and you have really embraced playtime in the big bathtub at night. You only have one little rubber ducky to play with, but it's hard to get you out of the bath now. You splash and giggle, and swim yourself in circles.

 

You are the most ticklish little boy I have ever seen. Your daddy and I love to torture you with endless tickles until your laughter turns to snorting. Even when I put lotion on your cheeks at night, you can't control yourself. It is impossible not to share the laughter with you.

 

You have finally mastered the art of crawling... army crawling, that is. You are fully capable of getting on all fours, but with the slick hardwood floors you much prefer to slide yourself across the house. And you move fast. You rarely pull yourself up, but with a little help you will stand at your table and play for an hour. You also love to get around in your walker, but haven't quite figured out how to go forward. You can hold my hands and walk pretty far, too. I don't think it will be long before you're running all over this house.

 

You are waving all the time now! One of my very favorite things. You're starting to clap too, but its still a work in progress. You have a soft little grunt when you're sleepy, and you still roll those "r"s just before you get fussy. My little Cuban jumping bean :)

 

Christmas is just around the corner, and shortly after we will be celebrating your first birthday. It still seems unreal. The longest 10 months of my life followed by the fastest year of my life... and all together the happiest and greatest time I could have ever imagined. Life is far too short.

 

Love you forever,

Mama